When you imagine a sexual space exclusively for femmes what do you imagine? If it’s a magical wonderland that smells like pink and red, sounds like hundreds of little pleasure explosions and looks like a tapestry of entangled limbs, you’ve come to the right place.
‘One Night is an event series, [currently based in London], where femme-leaning people can meet other like-minded individuals, explore their sexuality or/and develop friendships without feeling any pressure to engage in sex or look a certain way. It is a space which welcomes women and femme-leaning non-binary people of all ethnic backgrounds, social backgrounds, body types, sexual preferences and ages (18+, unless the venue states otherwise).’
Since their informal launch in 2016, One Night has grown remarkably from holding parties of 40, to their most recent event which hosted 800 people. One Night Parties are one of the most well regarded kink events in the UK for one simple reason – they care about what they do, and it shows.
Known for their non-conformist approach to kink events, from porn screenings on arrival to games of spin the bottle, One Night Parties feels less like death by dungeon and more like a slice of sin in girl-heaven. The only male present is lying on the floor to be used as a human toilet, (obviously). We sat down with the babe behind the babe-land, founder, Miss Gold. She is a visionary and a creative, also working with her partner as the much-adored fetish photography duo, The London Vagabond.
- How did you get into the kink world?
- How did One Night Parties develop from there?
- What's the vibe of One Night Parties?
- Has your mission changed since you started out?
- Do you feel that your parties are helping people?
- What are your fave parties outside of One Night?
- Are you proud of One Night Parties?
- What do you wish could change right now in the kink scene?
- What do you predict for the future of kink events?
- What are your goals for the future with One Nights?
How did you get into the kink world?
I have always had an intrigue about sexuality and promiscuity from a young age. Growing up, I had dreams of being a dancer or on page 3 when I was older. I was very interested in women who unashamedly expressed their sexuality.
Then around the age of 23, I had this fixation that I really wanted to give a guy a golden shower. When I met my current partner, he was completely up for it. And that was my first step into kink! When it comes to sex work, my first experience was with my friend, who was offering full service work. One of her clients was interested in domination, which suited my tastes. The rest is history…
When you put women in a room together all wearing very little, you lose your inhibitions and connect with each other in a completely different way.
How did One Night Parties develop from there?
I used to manage club nights in Nottingham. I ran this night- ‘Call Tyrone’, which allowed women free entry, whilst men had to pay. There began my prioritisation of women in the nightlife scene!
Then in 2016, I threw this party at a friend’s house. It was around the time that we started London Vagabond. We invited a few people that we had met online. It was un-ticketed, lingerie themed, femme only, apart from my partner who is a sub and played that role.
It was at this horrible house in Shadwell, with the bathtub being the only form of watersports equipment we had! But despite all of this, it showed me that when you put women in a room together all wearing very little, you lose your inhibitions and connect with each other in a completely different way.
I wanted to create a queer femme space; a party that I myself would love to attend.
As The London Vagabond grew, we started photographing mainstream sex parties. There was this big party that me and my partner were photographing. I was pregnant at the time. At one point, a random guy approached me. He grabbed my stomach and asked my partner for permission for him to touch himself whilst he continued to touch me?! My partner was the one wearing a collar, so it made no sense.
I came away from that experience feeling so strongly that we needed a real, established femme-only space, without the male gaze being so present. There were female spaces in London, but they were more ‘high femme’ and not inclusive of trans women or non-binary people.
One Night was born out of a love for sexual spaces, but a disdain for entitled men.
So One Nights was born. We first held them at a friend’s space- Inanna Studio. The capacity was 40 people. About 18 months ago we started to move them into bigger spaces and it’s gone mad. Our smallest parties are around 150 people and our latest party was 800.
What’s the vibe of One Night Parties?
I would say that it smells like pink and red! It’s electric, it’s magical, it’s freeing, it’s sensory, it’s powerful…it’s indescribable. Everyone says it’s very sapphic. You can feel people around you making friends. There’s pleasure explosions all around, entangled limbs everywhere you look. At one of our venues, there’s surround screens, with live projections on the wall of the action happening in real time.
It’s as though you’ve just entered this strange portal to another world, because a femme only (minus the man on the floor being a human toilet) sexual space is so special and rare.
Each party has a different flavour. One night there’ll be a cake sitting, other nights we’ll have a suspension performance from a Shibari artist. Sometimes we’ll have house dommes with whom you can book a session.
Has your mission changed since you started out?
The mission has always been to make our events available to as many women and NB/femme exploring people as possible. It’s about finding a way to get anyone into this space who wants to be there.
There is a divide between the kink world and the sex work world, which is funny to me because sex workers are really the cement of the kink world.
So bridging that gap is really important to me! Supporting sex workers is a big priority. We not only hire sex workers to perform, but we also hire them to work behind the bar, or on the toy shop stalls etc. As we’ve got bigger, we’ve also been able to offer low-income tickets too.
When I first started out, as an able-bodied person, accessibility admittedly wasn’t right at the forefront of my mind. But as we’ve progressed, this has also become very important to me, which is another reason why we no longer operate at Inanna Studio – it was only accessible via a huge flight of stairs.
Our mission is also about encouraging people to be nice to each other. Bitchiness is a big no. It’s about uplifting each other. One way that our goals have changed is that initially One Night leaned towards a space to explore dominance specifically, but that’s totally not what it’s about now. It’s about exploring all forms of sex and sexuality.
Do you feel that your parties are helping people?
When you first do something, you don’t realise that it’s going to have this butterfly effect. My friend was holding a gathering the other day, and she showed me the list of guests and it turned out that everyone on the list were people that she had met at One Night Parties!
I have seen first-hand that our parties really do foster a community of women and non binary people. I also feel like it’s helpful to some as a gateway party. For example, you might be too nervous to go to your first big, mixed gender party, so you can go to One Night Parties first as a toe-dipper.
What are your fave parties outside of One Night?
I work at most of them, so I don’t get to play often! Klub Verboten is probably my favourite. They really care about the community and what they’re doing.
Pedestal is fun. Jane Gray’s party, Scene is great too! It’s playful, anti-black latex, which is cool. Torture Garden is great because you have all the old-school archaic kinksters from back in the day.
Rubber Cult was amazing to photograph. I felt I had fallen down the rabbit hole into a wonderland! I honestly appreciate all of these spaces.
Are you proud of One Night Parties?
I just love seeing people having a good time! I have moments where I’m proud, but most of the time I’m too preoccupied with thinking about what more I can do, what I can do next to pause for a second and be proud. Plus, I feel like there’s still a negative connotation to pride, so perhaps I reject it? It is a sin, after-all…
What do you wish could change right now in the kink scene?
I wish more things were available to us. For example, we’re not allowed to openly promote some of the venues we have the parties at, which really affects our ticket sales or how much press we get.
Kink parties are safer than all of the mainstream nightclubs. We have less sexual assaults and less violence than any other kind of nightlife in London, yet we are the most condemned.
Many venues are just terrified and are stopping holding parties. All of us in the community are having to fight so much. This really needs to change.
What do you predict for the future of kink events?
There’s lots of new parties popping up. I think there will be spaces catering for every type of person and every type of kink. There’s still the FetLife kind of parties going on, but there’s also a younger, cooler and queerer kink scene emerging. One that is a bit more Instagram friendly!
What are your goals for the future with One Nights?
Take over the world(!) I would love to do parties across the globe like in Berlin and Australia. I hope we can soon go up North to Manchester.
One goal would be to have our own bespoke-made One Night equipment, suited specifically for femmes. I want to get more involved with education and showcasing other people’s voices at larger panel events. Finally, I would love to have a One Night lingerie line!
Discover more about One Night Parties.
Discover BDSM experiences on Sensuali.
Read: The ultimate guide to London’s sex parties.
Iso
Iso is a writer and filmmaker based in East London. She is passionate about all things erotic and leads a sexy, shame-free life in hope that she can inspire others to do the same. Originally from a Northern seaside town, she is naturally drawn to the best things in life: candyfloss, trashy karaoke bars and heart-shaped sunglasses.
