Based on recent convos I’ve been having with friends still in the sugar game, it’s rough out there! Rates skyrocketed at the beginning of the pandemic, as high-net-worth men made crazy gains on their investments. And for as good of a return as the normal finance bros were getting, the crypto-bros were making it rain to an unfathomable degree. This boost in capital paired with tons of free time and a lack of travel opportunities led to an influx of sugar daddies with loads of sugar into the sex work ecosystem. But what goes up must come down.
With all the uncertainty in the world combined with a downturn in the economy and rising inflation rates, daddies are tightening their purse strings just like the rest of us. I decided to do some sleuthing myself, setting up a new profile on a sugar daddy website comparable to the profile I used during my sugar baby heyday (same pics, same age, same bio, etc.), and found that the rumors were true. Men are expecting way more for way less and I empathize with my sex-work-sisters-in-arms who are out there trying to hustle.
As someone who has lived through economic upheaval and experienced changes in the sugar economy herself, here are some tips on how best to navigate sex work in a recession:
Don’t Take it Personally
I know how degrading it can be to have a dollar amount thrown at you for a meetup based almost exclusively on pictures of yourself – especially when that amount doesn’t come anywhere near to what you think you’re “worth” / the amount you need to make rent / the allowance you’ve gotten in the past. My advice? Take a deep breath and remind yourself, “It’s not me, it’s the markets.”
I’m also a big believer in the push/pull dynamics of energy. When we want something and seek it out with a sense of desperation, the universe has a way of fucking us over. We are “pushing” and the universe is “pulling” away from us. Just think of romantic relationships. When someone is pushing too hard aka being overly eager or double texting, we lose interest. But when they pull away by giving us space or playing it cool, we can’t help but be attracted.
In my experience, the same shit applies to sugar relationships. Anytime I’ve been in scarcity mindset, I’ve gotten nothing but shitty connections — cheap and/or borderline psychopathic men I had no attraction to and who I agreed to meet up with solely because of my lack of options. No longevity. No empowerment. Just dissociation and emotional trauma.
On the other hand, when I have other things going for me — whether it’s a steady daddy or another source of income completely independent from sugaring — I find myself coming at things from more of an abundance mindset. I am less thirsty and the universe rewards me with higher caliber men and more lucrative opportunities as a result.
Diversify your Income
In order to shift from scarcity to abundance mindset, it’s important to have multiple streams of income at any given time. This way, if one of those sources falls through, you are not scrambling to replace it. Perhaps if you’ve been relying solely on sex work to pay your bills, it’s worth giving something else a try — at least on a part-time basis.
Get an office job, become a server, or take a stab at being a sex work influencer — imagine getting sponsored to share your crazy sexscapades with the world! The grim reality is that the recession we find ourselves in is unlike any we’ve ever experienced.
The pandemic has collided with a potential WWIII and even the most knowledgeable of financial experts can’t say with certainty when this economic downturn will end. As such, the rich are hunkering down and cutting costs, which means you should too. If you do have cash to spare, invest it in the market (buy low, sell high!) rather than blowing it all on partying and designer clothes.
If you live in a cosmopolitan city, this is the time to go winter in a cheap, beautiful place like Thailand or Bali. Inflation is making already expensive places unbearable for lower wage workers who were living paycheck to paycheck even before the price of everything went up by 8%. Rest assured, London will still be there six months from now, as will its daddies.
Nurture Existing Relationships
The cold, hard truth is that the supply of sugar babies is up (due to the aforementioned inflation/economic uncertainty), while demand is down. This makes it a buyer’s market. Daddies have access to a large number of babies and can afford to be highly selective.
Moreover, they can get away with paying less for “higher quality” babies. This puts any baby entering the market at a distinct disadvantage. As amazing as you are, the odds are against you when it comes to finding that unicorn of a daddy who will commit to you because everyone is competing to land him.
Your best bet? Nurturing existing relationships. When you’re just a picture and a one line bio, it’s easy for you to fall through the cracks. But when you’ve created a relationship with someone, you’ve made a mark — a lasting impression that can and will set you apart from the crowd.
A daddy who knows your back story, has shared intimate moments with you, and has a reason to be rooting for you will be much more compelled to be your patron when you are in need than some rando you’re meeting online for the first time.
If you are new to the game, I suggest focusing on cultivating these types of substantive relationships, instead of the dime-a-dozen pay-per-meet ones. The men looking for casual hookups are the ones who will be quick to drop you when something better comes along.
Jules
Based in Brooklyn, Jules has dedicated her twenties towards harnessing her pussy power, exploring the muse, whore, and wild woman archetypes along the way. When not blogging, you can find her sweating the toxins out in a hot yoga class or sipping a matcha latte at a pretentious coffee shop, whilst she scribbles away in her journal.
